Revised : How to Raise a Happy Baby Through on Demand Nursing

“There is no finer investment for any community than putting milk into babies.” ~ Winston Churchill


Steps

1. Set up a nursing station - Find a comfortable place in the house where you like to nurse. Stock it up with the essentials, water, the phone, maybe a book or a notepad. It may be good to have the diaper changing station close by.
2. Respond quickly to your babies crying. From Erick Erickson's Eight Stages of Development we learn that the first and most important thing your infant learns is Basic Trust Versus Basic Mistrust. Responding quickly to your baby will teach him that the world is a safe place.
3. Go to your comfy spot and nurse your crying infant. I know this seems so simple, but really many a new mother has stressed about what to do with a crying baby.
4. Relax, watch your babies muscles relax now that she is nursing. Take inspiration from her, relax your muscles also. But, you will say, there is more to raising a child then nursing...
5. Examine your baby. Is he cold, hot, or in need of a diaper change? Now that he is close to you it is a perfect time to check over his physical well bing.
6. Think, what other things might your baby need. Does your baby want attention, A nap, if so you job is easy because she is already dosing off. While you are still sitting there calm and relaxed think of what you can do to best help this baby stay happy. Can you carry them in a sling while you work? Can you sit them in a bouncy chair where they can watch you run about the house and clean it? Can you give them an interesting object to put in their mouth?
7. Act, when your baby is done nursing solve any problems that the baby is in need of.
8. Set the baby up to be happy. Maybe attach her to you with a sling or a pack. Maybe put the baby in an exerciser or a seat where she can watch you work. Place within the babies filed of experience a toy, a kitchen utinsle (a whisk works great) or some other daily object that is safe. If you set the baby up well you may be able to get something done while she is happy.
9. Return the lost toy, and check in, in order to encourage your baby to be happy longer. If your baby is close by where they can watch you work you can catch little problems before they become big. If a toy is dropped you can pick it up before the baby cries and gets upset. Check in often with your baby. Put your face close to the baby so that they can see you. Talk to the baby and stroke his soft little head. This little check in when the baby is not upset will strengthen your babies confidence and trust in their care
10. Repeat


Tips

* This method will still work as your child gets older. When he falls down, nurse him. When he is sad because a toy broke nurse him. Etc. This method is so simple and takes much stress out of your life. When the baby starts to cry you don't have to start to stress about what you should do. Nurse the baby and when both you and he are clam you will get other ideas about how to help him further.
* Remember each time you quickly and efficiently help him stop crying and take care of his needs you teach him to trust the world, that it is safe. And you make him into a more confidant individual. You will find if you keep up with this that your baby cries allot less then other babies, that your baby calms down easier, that your baby is more safe and secure feeling. You may find to your surprise that you have a harder time parting with your baby then he has with you. He knows you will be there when he needs you so he is not worried.
* If you can not come right away when the baby cries start to communicate with it. Say things like. "I hear you, I am coming as soon as I can. But I must get the cake out of the oven before it burns. Wait just a min." You baby might not stop crying when you tell it what you are doing, and that you are on your way. But the baby will still learn from this pattern. Keep talking to the baby even if it is crying, even if it is crying loud enough it can not hear you. Keep telling it you will come as soon as you can. Young infants and children learn through repetition. Eventually your young baby will learn to wait patiently when it must. Singing this to your child can give the child added comfort. Repeatedly sing something like this. "I am coming ,coming coming, I am coming to help you." It is silly I know but it works. Just keep repeating, your baby will learn through repetition and patterns.
* For an older baby you can help him learn to wait for something through repetious singing also. Like when my 18 month old wants to join his older sisters outside and is crying because he can not open the door. I scoop him up in my arms and as I bundle him up to go out side I sing something like this "You are going outside after your coat is on, you are going out side after your shoes are on..." This repitious song can help them gain confidence that their needs will be met and teach them about processes.
* Eventually you will become like the baby whisperer and know what your baby needs. But even still there will always be times when you do not know what your baby needs or how to help them be happy, at these times start with nursing to make things more simple for you and your baby.
* When it is time for you to leave your child with someone else do not sneak out when your baby is not looking. If you do you will loose your childs trust. Even your young infant will learn to trust you through repition. I may be silly but when my child is old enough to notice me leaving him I pick them up and tell them. "Mama is leaving you for about 2 hours, Aunt Dee will be here to take care of you, and I will be back soon." If you consistently tell your child you are leaving and consistently tell them you are coming back, they will learn to trust you. If a child is afraid that you will sneak out on them at any time they will try harder to not let you get away with that trick. Tension will rise and it will get harder and harder to sneak out. Better to let the child cry at parting at first and gain trust. Then to break their trust and sneak out and have the child cry anyways when they realize that you snuck away.


Warnings

* If you are just switching to this on-demand-nursing method you will find that all transitions are difficult. Your baby will want to test the waters and make sure that you will pick him up and comfort him whenever he wants you to. You will find that at first your baby will need and ask for much much more attention. Like with every other thing in life your baby is testing the new limits. Have faith and know that once you teach your child "I will respond quickly to your needs." He will develop confidence in this fact, and need attention less, and be comforted more quickly.
* Every where you turn you can get advice on how to raise a baby, and most likely you do get it everywhere you turn weather or not you want it. Much of this advice will come at you in a black and white form. "You must do X in order to be a good mother, if you don't do exactly X everything will fail." These doomsday ultimate predictions are never correct. You are a unique being, your baby is a unique being. What works for you and your infant is a unique solution that only you can find. No one can tell you what will work for you and your infant. They can only tell you what worked for them and their infant. Babies are resilient. Being a normal good mother, finding your own best way, making mistakes, and having imperfect moments is part of life. Please whatever you do, do not cause yourself more emotional stress by being harsh on yourself, if you do not follow this advice to the T, or anyone else's advice. The way it works for someone else will not be the exact same way it works for you. Take in the parts that improve your life and leave out the parts that stress you. You are custom making your own unique solution.
* If your baby is in a social mood she will quickly wrap you around her little finger and make you forget all your to-do's. Go with it, Your little darling is only this little for a short time.
* don't be afraid to hold your baby too much or give your baby too much attention. There is an old parenting philosophy that still lingers some, some older ladies will still tell you "You are spoiling that baby." Hugs and attention does not spoil a baby, manipulation spoils a baby. A Spoiled child manipulates in order to get what they want.